Tag: psychosis
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Can I have some dopamine, please?
I keep trying to understand the role of dopamine in developing psychosis. Of course that is unlikely to happen as even scientists don’t understand the connection, they only assume dopamine causes psychosis. But if I’m on medication that reduces effects of dopamine in the brain and dopamine is responsible for brain reward system (at least […]
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The beauty of an empty mind
I’m not sure how I’m going to keep the blog going, although does that really matter when no one really reads it. My mind is totally empty, I’m not sure if it’s olanzapine or the fact I’m now focused on my studies or a bit of both, but I don’t have any content in my […]
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I don’t want to focus on any external stimuli today
As you may be aware I decided not to meet John today. I don’t know what it is exactly: side effect of medication, side effect of psychosis, laziness, low motivation, trying to save up all the mental energy for going back to work next week or just me being my autistic self, but I feel […]
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I mustn’t eat those mince pies
John came over and brought some mince pies. Normally I’d have one after dinner but the thought I need to go back on olanzapine made me realise something: I have to learn to say no to food! Otherwise I’ll explode one day or at least won’t be able to get through the door. When I […]
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Aripiprazole is ‘activating’
Unless you can’t sleep, then it’s agitating. And what I mean by that is, two nights of very poor sleep and I’m too tired to think clearly, yet still quite energetic. So what I do? Walk around my flat in circles. I do worry the story from my first episode may repeat – funilly enough […]
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Amygdala and excitement
Too much happened during the last couple of days for someone who just left psychiatric hospital. But then, I don’t want to deny myself experiences, especially positive. Did I ever tell on the blog that I never learned how to deal with excitement? I believe it’s controlled by amygdala, the same like fear and danger. […]
Autistic and me 