1. Someone on my Facebook bipolar group asked how we experience mania, so I said this: ‘I don’t experience mania as such; I go almost straight to psychosis and after two days I have police drugging me out of my flat. After psychosis I’m hypomaniac for a bit which means high productivity, energy and creativity,…
Feeling mentally refreshed
That’s a new feeling for me, isn’t it? Some of you may remember how I used to complain about being mentally tired all the time. What caused it? A book I’m reading in Polish. ‘Honey, I killed the cats’ by Dorota Masłowska (you can download English language version from Kindle store). The novel is classed…
My book cover looks like vagina
Apparently. That’s what I was told! Those images are patterns! You know how it feels? I was being rejected for so many years for how I see things and now I wrote a book about it and I’m being rejected again! I’m having a mini meltdown.
Autistic writer’s block
As you may remember I started writing an experimental novel. Why it’s experimental? Because I can’t write a regular novel, or at least that’s how I feel. Being autistic I have problems with imagining how people may react in various situations and I think my characters were rather flat sometimes in my first novel I…
Autism and copying other people
It is said that autistic people, females especially, copy other people behaviour because they want to fit in, have no confidence, are worried about rejection… which may all be true, but since I started doing my digital art, I realised I copy style of art that I recently saw and felt fascinated by; or sometimes…
Can’t wait for my large canvases (should I just quit????)
As you may know I had rebound mania since just after leaving hospital on Thursday. While waiting to be discharged I decided to go to uni, chose a subject within like 2 minutes and the university within the next 30 seconds. And then, while already at home, I decided to provide confidence building training for…
Now I want to express myself through art, but it has to be on a really large canvas and
The Range only had medium sizes. Small canvases were really suffocating but I felt I was being responsible by playing small when not having experience.
I’m not very linear, am I? But I never claimed I was.
Effective altruism (in Swindon)
I’m not sure if I understand the concept correctly but it seems to be about praising people and organisations that do good. I normally complain here about various options of support that seem to be available in the UK, but when one (especially an autistic one) reaches out, it turns out there’s nothing substantial there…