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Something positive
For a few days now one of the games I downloaded when I was in Poland sends me an unusual notification every evening: ‘Love is everywhere. Just look for it.’ There is a heart symbol at the end. When I first saw it I thought it’s really strange, why a game would send this type…
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How I look for a job
So I see a job advert, let’s call it job A, I quite like it and apply for it. Then I see job B adverised, it still sounds ok but I would prefer job A. I feel like I should not apply for job B till after I find out I wasn’t successful with A.…
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Home at last
I felt very weird when I got into my flat yesterday, it seemed like something is different. I remember thinking to myself ‘this is your home now’. I never thought about it as my home, home was in Smardzewice, the flat in Swindon was only a place where I lived. I suppose now, after I…
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How does dementia start?
I didn’t sleep very long again but I should be ok. I’m thinking now that I’m glad I came and even that I lost my ID and had to stay longer. Due to that I could have seen how my mum’s mental state deteriorated, if I didn’t see that I would not believe she has…
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I’m not going back
My emotions are so raw now. I don’t want to go anywhere, I feel so bad for leaving my mum now, when she needs me more than anything. She has care but… I need to be able to see her. To see how she’s coping. To see how much she changed. What if she doesn’t…
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Silent meltdown
Meltdown is apparently when an autistic person loses touch with reality, may scream, cry or even lay down under the table. Well, at least that’s what I was made to believe. I never behave this way. I feel like I’m screaming inside but I keep my cool. I was probably screaming as a child at…