That is a title of one of a recent Redecor challenges. And guess what I read? Funeral. This is not the first time when I realised that I twist words that I see to fit into what I have in my head. Possibly that’s why communication with us is so difficult? I wonder, however, if neurotypical people also do that.

And that means possibly John does that too? In that case is exchanging emails with him going to bring me to any solution? Is it not going to be more likely that we’ll just end up arguing like crazy? But then, what I’m supposed to do instead? Some parts of our relationship were wonderful but still, I’d like some things to be different. Mostly I’d like more spontaneous time together and I don’t even know if he’d like that too and only kept his distance because he found my problems overwhelming, or rather he’s not interested in spending more time together as he likes being on his own even more than I do.

That is really confusing to me. I don’t know what to do.