I woke up terribly worried again about my mum: her wellbeing, her care home, her pressure sores and the fact I need to get dressings but don’t know which size to get. Also I need to deliver her medical history to her care home but I don’t know where to get it from, whether it will all be at her last surgery or do I need to visit every place she was getting any treatment. It feels again like if I walked into the wall. I don’t like that feeling at all.

I stayed in bed for quite a while doing exactly this: worrying, until around three hours later I realised that I may call the care home and ask what sizes of dressings they need. My level of anxiety went down immediately. I now wonder why I can’t come up with such a simple solutions straight away, without all that mental struggle.

But at least I managed that without any suicidal thoughts this time, so I guess this is a progress.