Mum doesn’t understand how things work in modern society. Once, I remember, she gave me her ID card asking to go to her bank to ask about something, but I was not authorised to have access to her account. She didn’t understand that, she thought having her ID card will be enough.

But she always wanted to help me. It only really worked when what she was required to do was simple enough. I remember, when I was in psychiatric hospital in Poland, and patients were only allowed out when accompanied, and there was no even a patio there to get some fresh air, she was coming to take me out almost every day, even though her back was hurting.

She wanted to sacrifice herself for me this way and now I don’t have this no more. I don’t know how my life is going to look like without her.