If people don’t follow your guidance, do this

Pleasie 🙂

Just a quick post as I’m rather tired.

I am aware that some autistics complain that other people don’t listen when the autistic comes up with a great idea. It is sometimes difficult to know what to say for that – it can sometimes be our fault and the idea may not be very good, we only perceive it like that.

I must say I generate ideas very quickly but most of them are not very mature. Let’s take this one when I wanted to get a job as a trainee auditor in Nationwide and was hoping that using my autistic traits would help me achieve results other people can’t or when I wanted to take Ukrainian refugee and blog about our interactions. Mind you, I really wanted to help somebody, don’t get me wrong, but if I can barely cope with a friend, how would I be able to live with a stranger who experienced recent severe trauma?

It can take me up to three days to realise that an idea I have is ridiculous but it seems to me that blogging speeds up the process. I guess writing is helping but also the fact that I find is slightly easier to imagine how my idea may be perceived by others when I imagine that people read my post. It was very difficult when I didn’t know that I’m autistic and had no understanding why I keep having those ideas that I then abandon. It sometimes felt to me that I should do the thing anyway, even if it didn’t feel right any more. That was probably the most difficult of all my autistic traits, it felt even worse than being rejected by people.

However, sometimes we may have a brilliant idea, possibly an understanding of a certain concept that other people didn’t grasp yet. What should we do then? Eliminating an opponent is something that a narcissist would do while winging won’t make us look very intelligent.

We also need to remember that the same situation may happen to non autistic person; it’s certainly not just autistic people who don’t get the opportunities they deserve.

What I saw smart non autistic people do in similar situations is that they hint the opponent’s idea may not be very good but they don’t interfere. They continue to do their job and let their opponent fail. And only then, when people are ready to listen, they share the depth of their expertise.

Perhaps we should learn from those people.

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