Tag: mental health
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I miss Poland, terribly
I didn’t get to blog very often recently and I don’t think this is going to change. One reason is I now have permanent job, the other is the fact that I’m writing experimental novel and I’m focused on that but I think there’s also a third reason for posting much less: my olanzapine tablets…
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Goblin mode and my book promotion
It’s 12.40, I have to leave for work in 50 minutes. Goblin mode has been voted an expression of the year 2022. I feel like I’m in a goblin mode a lot for some time now. I was thinking about Ashley yesterday quite a lot. I unfollowed her blog sometimes in September, when I was…
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R.I.P. Ashley
Do you remember Ashley Peterson, the mental health blogger who used to comment on my posts a lot before I cosed comments? She passed away on the 9th of October and her family hinted on the blog she commited suicide. What else those words could mean? ‘She could no longer bear the suffering she was…
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A few more words about punishment
After work I waited 40 minutes for a bus that was supposed to be there every 10 minutes. And it was freezing! I would normally get home in 15 minutes walk but I had the idea to go to Lidl for some groceries. I have a lot of what I needed at home but I…
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My personal values
In the book I’m reading, ‘How confidence works’ by Ian Robertson I found this set of personal values: Relationship with family and friends Being creative Having a sense of humour (I didn’t know this can be a value) Independence Business or work Political commitment Religious or moral values Living life for the moment; being spontaneous…
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Eastern Europeans are unhappy
That’s what I’ve just read in ‘How confidence works’ by Ian Robertson and it may actually be true. Apparently it’s because we’re not well adjusted to freedom and making choices. It makes some sense to me indeed. Perhaps what I think is related to being autistic is, at least partly, due to being from Eastern…
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I’m not a role model, am I?
When I started blogging that how I saw it: I wanted to use this platform to somehow give other autistic people guidance on how to live their life and to do that I felt I needed to improve myself first. What happened instead I turned the blog into journal. Is it useful? I don’t know.…
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This option is not available. Trigger warning
It came to a point that I Googled assisted death in Netherlands. Unfortunately I don’t experience ‘unbearable suffering with no prospect of improvement’. It feels unbearable at times but I didn’t really try to improve my mental health. Anyway, as I said on the blog a few times, I believe my suicidal thoughts are a…
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Word count
I finished polishing my uni assignment today and guess what? We were meant to write 2000 words and the word ‘around’ wasn’t included in the brief. I was obviously worried that if I write 1900 it may be too little while 2100 may be too many so I monitored my word count very closely and,…
Autistic and me 