Tag: brother
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Dear neighbours (and a bit more about my diagnostician’s communication methods)
The beauty of living in a village in Poland is, that you have neighbours. Well, obviously, people who live almost anywhere in the world, also in the cities, have neighbours but Polish village neighbours seem to know everything about each other. My Smardzewice neighbours still have impact on my life even though I moved thousands […]
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Complex family dynamics
Trigger warning: mentions possibility of suicide in the family I didn’t write about my brother for quite a while, I guess I maybe mentioned him once or twice since I had to leave our family home and move to the hostel back in September. He is not a glamorous person to write about: he is […]
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Feeling joy again
I suppose there are some advantages to being unemployed, like for example I can post several times a day, including about things from the past. I do wonder sometimes if I possibly post ‘too much’ but I guess no one can decide about that, but me. Also, as much as it would be cool to […]
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Early morning, Saturday
Mum asked me to get her mobile fixed for her and I did but I’m not sure now it was a good idea. My brother will be calling her and demanding money and getting things organised. But then, what I was supposed to say? She’s an adult, adults have mobiles. A couple of days ago […]
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Feeling guilty
Hostel is pretty busy the last 3 days. I think every room is taken now, but still it’s a small place in general so it’s not like there’s loads of people here. I’ve heard a lady speaking on the phone in the hallway that she needs to have a rest and that’s why she’s here. […]
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I want to break free
That’s how I understand challenging behaviour. Challenging behaviour is not just something that autistic people with learning disability display, high functioning autistics can also do that, but ours are of course different. Arguing can be form of challenging behaviour and I was guilty of it more than once. I believe we do that to break […]
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Hot afternoon
I keep walking outside of the hostel, enjoying hot weather and nice area around me but I keep thinking I should be with mum. That’s of course impossible due to Covid. The annoying thing is that number of infections is really low in the entire country. I guess it’s just a precaution but why now, […]
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Zopiclone
I took zopiclone at 11 and woke up at 4am feeling anxious. It is enormous responsibility to move mum to a place that we have to pay for if I know that funds are limited. Something happened yesterday in relation to her current care home, that made me realise that the nurses are not necessarily […]
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18.25 – I called mum!
I got enough courage today to call my mum. I felt really strange after I last tried to speak with her and she wasn’t replying. Plus I didn’t know what to tell her about everything. Mum was really alert, which is obviously good. She wanted to know the truth about my brother so I said […]
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Back at the hostel
I finally know where all the people from the area spend their Sunday: in the adventure park just outside of my window! It’s very busy there today. I feel like I could do with a nap. I don’t know who is going to sort out the papers for the police for tomorrow, I don’t feel […]
Autistic and me 