Tag: being social
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I feel so inadequate
With my little blog. Considering what is happening in Ukraine it really feels like my problems are so unimportant. And yet, they are my problems and my blog is about life as an autistic person so there’s nothing else I can write about. I mean, I can post my opinion on Putin war. Is he…
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What do we need face expressions for?
I just came back from pizza dinner with the Meet Up group. I thought it’s going to be fun, like the events that I used to attend before lockdown, but it wasn’t. I’m not sure, why? Maybe because the guy who always entertains people with his stories wasn’t there? You see, in my mind, if…
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I started missing human connection
Seriously, that happens sometimes, even for us, autistics. I need a lot of time for myself before I start missing people, but it’s not the first time it happened. The last couple of weeks it’s been mostly me at home – even when I was working it was not in settings where social interaction played…
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‘I’m like that too’ (nothing wrong with that)
I know that a lot of autistic people absolutely hate when they try to explain to a neurotypical person how they see the world or what issues they experience and the neurotypical person suddenly is like ‘You know? I’m like that too!’ Although I understand this may be said in condescending way to mean ‘you’re…
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Manifesting?
I spent significant part of the afternoon reading or listening to podcasts about, well… manifesting. I’m not sure how well known that term is, but if you ever heard about The Secret, you will know what I mean. Initially I just wanted some positive thinking exercises to improve my ability to understand that yes, the…
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The ‘Liking Gap’? What’s that?
https://www.vice.com/en/article/4avx73/the-liking-gap-is-why-you-always-wonder-if-people-secretly-hate-you I just found out about this phenomenon called the liking gap. From the article I take that relates to neurotypicals. So apparently it is when someone meets a new person and then assumes that that person didn’t like them, while they in fact did. It’s really confusing to read it, because I was under…
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I neet to bring myself back to a sensible state
I received an email around an hour ago from my work coach provided by NHS service. The email was about what could cause a discharge (things like missing appointments or not looking for work). I was a bit surprised as I somehow thought the support is unconditional. It never was explained to me that it’s…
Magda Z.
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I think I’m an emotional vampire
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/emotional-freedom/201101/the-5-kinds-emotional-vampires-you-could-encounter Or at least I was, before diagnosis. The article is from 2011, so when understanding of female presentation of autism was not there at all. I can see some of my behaviours described in the article. But I’m wondering how a fairly famous psychiatrist couldn’t see that the people who create problems actually need…
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The day after the meltdown
As my blog is about recording how I think and feel I need to provide an update after yesterday night time meltdown. I guess I am not too bad, although I feel shattered and also, just slightly on the edge. I think I will be staying at home today, although it’s possible I’ll go out…
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What if I start telling the truth?
That’s the idea I had extremely recently. It’s 2.04am BTW. I can’t keep on doing that same thing anymore. It doesn’t work at all. It nevet will. I thought the shift went really well yesterday and, despite of some social tiredness, I actually felt like I liked the lady I worked with. And then she…
Autistic and me 