How is success achieved?

I spent over an hour reading through a peculiar website about equipment for ‘cell counting’. I didn’t really understand much, but I didn’t try to – it was just to see if reading through a material only to see a pattern is going to help me to calm down my brain.

And it did, quite a lot. But then, I realised something spectacular: people never discuss how they achieve success. It’s either ‘hard work’ without any more explanation, or modest ‘it just happened’ statement.

I only realised recently that people can get bullied into accepting a promotion. Did you know about that? If you’re neurotypical, you probably did. But I did not. I’ve heard some people say things like ‘I didn’t really want to be a manager’ but that never gets discussed any further. And yet, somehow, at 44, I realised that yes, one can get bullied to progress their career.

That will of course not be the same type of bullying I experienced in Home Group and, I assume, the bully will stop their questionable methods when they make the bullee (does that word even exist?) to be compliant. That’s the neurotypical world for you. Deal with it.

It makes perfect sense that things like that don’t get discussed. But then, that’s the result: I was offered an excellent opportunity to progress my career and I go mental now because I can’t see any pattern in what is happening. But I can’t see it because they’re not available anywhere, so I can’t compare my life events with anything I know. Perhaps someone could write some fairytales for autistic adults about it?

I guess ‘Devil wears Prada’ would be a good film for me to watch again, but the problem is, from what I remember, the main character leaves the job at the end, so that is not exactly an answer to my question.

4 responses to “How is success achieved?”

  1. Compliance doesn’t stop bullies.
    [not even the impression of compliance].
    They can be pressured, yes.
    What I mean is – the bully does not stop at compliance.
    And what kind of cells were being counted?
    Blood cells? Prison cells?

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    • O think if someone would bully a person to accept a promotion and that would happen, they would stop?

      Let’s say someone is wlrking hard but doesn’t want more responsibility and there are other people in the team who are very career driven. Then the first person would appear non threatening and their manager could prefer them to get promoted instead of the career driven people.

      I think I’ll make separate post about this cell counting website. No, they were not prison cells!

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      • When I read back I saw that they were something in science and in the body.
        That is the thing about *appearing* non-threatening.
        [the „working hard but not wanting *more* responsibility” scenario is very relatable]
        And if you have more than one career-driven person…
        The career-driven people would probably go anywhere and everywhere.
        Anne-Marie wrote about women and work and competition. She lives in a remote province of Canada and her blog is „Seclusion 101” – about life in retirement.
        Again, most possibly because it broke the pattern that the bully is used to rely on.
        Also I know cells from spreadsheets – the place where the rows and the columns meet.

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      • Possibly the cells from spreadsheets will be easier to count and I wouldn’t need the equipment. It was a bit expensive! Not that I need to count protein or DNA cells!

        I’m planning to make some ‘healthy’ muffins today. Only six of them. That will be easy to count 🙂

        Have a good day Adelaide!

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