Ok, so I managed to fall asleep eventually, sometimes after midnight, but I woke up scared in the middle of the night and I knew I wasn’t scared of anything else but sleeping. It’s shocking that traditianal meditation can do so much damage to my sleeping habits.

I managed to fall back asleep after that too and slept around 6h in total so it’s not too bad but I felt extreme exhaustion on waking up. I do feel like that regardless at times and I think it’s probably due to peri menopause, but today it was really bad.

I bought another subscription to Sleep School as soon as I woke up and will be doing exercises from it later on. I wonder if I have to say no to visualisation forever? I must say I liked it and, at the very minimum, it worked for my inability to imagine future. We will see, and of course I’ll be reporting on what happened.