I took olanzapine yesterday evening as I couldn’t stop feeling triggered and I know from experience that if I take it early enough one tablet is enough to bring my mind back to normal.

Today I may feel sad, or perhaps even depressed at times but I’m calm. The feeling of being triggered is completely gone. I suppose I am really lucky for having the option to take it when needed only and to be supported in this by my mental health team. And also, obviously, I’m lucky enough that this actually works for me. I suppose it may not for certain people, but still it probably would for others but they may not have the support of their psychiatrist to do that.

Psychotropic meds tend to give loads of side effects and I tried quite a lot of them after my first episode. With most of them side effects were unbearable. Olanzapine is not perfect either, it makes me eat a lot (although I can do that even without being on meds!), makes my sex drive completely disappear and it makes me groggy. But if I take one tablet only those side effects don’t have time to develop. Although I ate 4 pancakes for supper today! But if it’s one day only I will be ok.

I really wish this form of treatment was available for more people with history of psychosis.