That’s the idea I had extremely recently. It’s 2.04am BTW.

I can’t keep on doing that same thing anymore. It doesn’t work at all. It nevet will. I thought the shift went really well yesterday and, despite of some social tiredness, I actually felt like I liked the lady I worked with. And then she ignored my Goodbye, even though I said it twice. That’s the worst that may happen, because there will be no chance to make a good impression after that. I really don’t understand, it’s neurotypicals that are so focused on good impressions, and then suddenly they don’t care when I am involved? I pretend the entire time and they suddenly decide to become themselves around me? Why?

I really have to stop that. I guess I may need to start telling the truth. What about if I start with my housing situation? If someone who I barely know asks if I have my own place or rent I could say for example: I’m sorry but for me this is private so I won’t be discussing this with you now.

And then I will add: if you want to tell me about your housing situation that’s perfectly fine, but please, when you do that, try not to say that you can’t afford things. I noticed that ‘I can’t afford’ is British people favourite saying and I find it deeply disrespectful for those who live in countries that are much poorer that the UK.

I wonder what will happen if I say that? Will people respect my boundaries? Will they listen to my concerns when I present them? I really do not know.

But you know what would be the best outcome? If they do the above and, on top of that decide that I’m not really that much fun to talk to so they won’t have a chat with me longer than 90 seconds.

I was in situations before when people didn’t want to talk to me much and that didn’t bother me that a lot. What bothered me was that they also didn’t respect me.

I wonder if it’s difficult to learn to tell the truth. It shouldn’t be because the truth is what I think. But then, how come I never learned how to do that? It all doesn’t make much sense to me.